Queer people beware
Queer people beware! I'm wounded from my RMA experience. First, read their Google reviews & notice how they thank people for positive reviews but ignore negative reviews/don't ensure concerns are resolved. What does it say that they speak to those congratulating them but not those suffering as a result of bad experiences? My complaints: 1) doctors came in and touched me without asking consent because obviously women's bodies are objects; 2) The medical care is subpar. Because we're women and women, you know, don't deserve good healthcare, no one explained anything about the meds/what to expect. They didn't say, for example, "some people taking the hormones can't sleep," leaving me to Google at 4am what was happening to my body as if I wasn't paying them $20,000+ for their guidance. 3) communication was super unprofessional. The nurses sent instruction emails and every email had a spelling error, including the wrong address of the facility. 4) it is nearly impossible to get in touch. Even while you're spending LOTS of money, you still must call a number where a woman in Asia picks up and sends a message to the New York office to get a call back. I live a few miles away but had to call the other side of the globe to get a response from RMA down the street. That's personalized service? My two biggest complaints: 5) the mistreatment of LGBTQIA+ folx is truly wild. The marketing RMA does to "prove" how affirming they are is propaganda. FYI: being accepting of queer people and learning best practices for how to care for queer people is NOT THE SAME THING. To "lure" people in with a promise of queer-affirming care and then bombard us with exclusionary language is just cruel. You don't have to pretend to be good at treating queer folx. Just say "we accept you but know nothing about you" so we can go to people who do. It's mean to claim to know what you're doing and get vulnerable people in there only to treat them like outsiders. The number of times I was told that "all women's" partners shouldn't ejaculate after egg retrieval? The emails I got about vaginal intercourse with my male partner? UGH. One of the male doctors asked me how my husband felt about my treatment. I am a lesbian with no cisgender man in my life, which they knew. It was a defining part of my story/reason for going. I brought this up to the manager (Kim) who promised they'd change the language. I came back a month later for a 2nd round and...no changes. Have you visited the RMA website/looked at their LGBTQIA+ section? Mind-boggling how they can treat people and market themselves so differently. RMA needs SO MUCH TRAINING about queer issues. To think that they are sending out emails that fit straight paradigms with NO REGARD for how those paradigms fail to apply to a minority segment of the population, or the emotional impact it might have on that population to be that invisible, is WILD and SUCH POOR medical & intercultural practice. 6) My final complaint: I can't get a hold of anyone in there to make a complaint, short of calling the Westchester Human Rights Commission. I sent 5 emails/called 5 times but all outreach went unanswered. I wanted to share that I felt "othered," that my experience was far from inclusive, and that the language RMA used to speak about me, my body, and my plans made me feel bad about myself and my future. No response. Since RMA doesn't respond to negative reviews to learn how they can support you, I doubt I will get a response to this review. I guess that's who RMA is. I don't believe they truly care about their patients, especially queer patients. I would strongly advise queer folx to use other groups. And for any female-identified patients using RMA, be prepared to have docs walk in and stick things in you before they've even introduced themselves, asked for your consent to be touched, or explained what they're about to do. What will it take to get a call back and to be treated like a human being? What will it take for them to reach out and show that they care and are actually interested in learning how to be better?
By Laura